Honestly,
I kind of hate this time of year. It’s dark, gray and depressing. My beloved
Buffalo Bills are not in the playoffs, and it is our ‘S-L-O-W’ period. Why?
Well, apparently, most of you are too bloated on organic, free-range Christmas
goose and barrel-aged porter to be buying encased meats.
Or
worse yet, you have made a bunch of godawful resolutions, which have you running on treadmills instead of eating
pork. (I take this personally, by the way) And don’t even get me started on the
whole cleansing trend.
And
to complicate matters further, it’s cold. Really cold. Like freeze-yo’-damn-ass-off
cold. In fact, as of this writing, Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools has announced
a 2-hour delay for tomorrow morning. The official reason? Some kid might freeze his damn ass off
at the bus stop. I mean, it might just fall right the hell off. So there you
go. Safety first.
Now,
we can choose to wallow in this chilly discontent, or we can do something about
it. After all, this is AMERICA! And, you might ask what a humble American hot
dog vendor can do to shake off this depression?
Well,
we can fill your fat faces with flavor, that’s what we can do.
Forget
the Polar Vortex – this is a MOLAR VORTEX! The Forecast? Extended deliciousness
with periods of intense gustatory pleasure. And a Panthers win.
Chicken
Sandwiches
– We’ve been thinking about how to expand our product line without straying too
far from our core – which will always be hot dogs and sausages. Well, our
chicken tenders have been really popular, and they fit perfectly into a toasted
Martin’s Roll, so we thought we’d give them a try! Check out the BLT with our house
made Buttermilk Ranch Sauce, or dig into a JJ’s Fil-A sandwich – Fried Tenders,
Cole Slaw and a Pickle Spear. One bite, and you’ll forget all about those
‘other’ guys with the silly cows that can’t spell.
Sahlen’s
Premium All Beef Jumbos – Many of you have been asking for an all beef dog, so we thought
we’d step it up and give you the best one we could find – from Sahlen’s of
course. They are about twice the size of our regular dogs and we have designed
some toppings that will complement their beefy deliciousness. Like the Quarter
Hounder –Beer Queso, Bacon, Lettuce, Tomato and Onion and our own ‘Special
Sauce.’ And that’s just the beginning. Try them all!
Hall of Fame
Dogs
– These are some of our most popular dogs of the week from last year that we
thought we’d bring back. The ‘Hey, Hey, Fry, Fry’ is a staff favorite with Cole
Slaw, Tomatoes, French Fries and Remoulade. Also, the ‘Weiner the Pooh’ is back! Peanut Butter, Bacon and Honey.
You’re welcome!
We
hope you enjoy these new offerings as much as we enjoyed creating them. And -
all joking aside - we really had a great year last year, thanks to you. From
everyone here at JJ’s Red Hots, we would like to offer our sincere thanks for
your patronage.
Now
get in here and buy something. Don’t you people know how this economy works?!